I don't think I've ever felt this tired after a holiday before. I've lots to blog about, but very little enthusiasm... which is a little like what I said about exercise earlier on today!
Holiday was great and horrific. Not even in equal measure. To the people at work who've asked and said 'you'll have had a lovely time' I've just nodded and said yes. It was lovely. It was. But I was so relieved when I was talking to an adoptive mum last night and I said we'd gone away and she says 'how are you, how bad was it?' I'm so blessed to have people who get it in my life.
We had a wonderful time, we went to the beach and built sandcastles, and went in the sea. We went to an amazing adventure playground, which boy-o loved. We saw my Great Aunt and Uncle - boy-o even managed to get to sit on their tractor. I was still in shock that 5+ years after last visiting them we managed to find their somewhat obscure street (in the middle of no-where 5 miles to here, 4 miles to there). We did walks, we did playing, and we did no sleeping, regression in behaviour and high levels of stress and anxiety!
We know he would find it hard - why wouldn't he, somewhere strange? What sort of questions does it rise in his head?
And to back it worse, we came home on Saturday and spent all day Sunday either at Church or at friend's house as her youngest was baptised. And no pre-school this week. No return to routine. Can you guess how this week is going. We went to same friend's for eat up lunch on Monday, and she commented, he's not settled at the minute - and I just laughed. Luckily she is a friend that gets it - and works with small children.
M and I are trying some new ideas. Some things that seem to be working. Some that don't. Tonight's tantrum was superb.... I needed to leave at 6.15 to get were I was going on time.... we started to get him ready for bed about 5.50, so all M had to do was give him some milk and supper. I left at 6.40... after 30 mins of listening to boy-o scream. We did get him to calm down before I left... I was late. Who cares?
We will get there, or not and we will readjust our expectations.
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