Thursday, 26 May 2011

Life is...

Such fine plans... as usual interrupted by life. I am just about keeping up with commenting for ICLW - just need to do an extra days worth today! I have however got 292 posts in my reader to read... sorry if some of those are yours!

Life is trundling on. We've had a visit from the health visitor this week. She has obviously gone away and done some research about adopted children and attachment issues. When she came for boy-o's review meeting she was very keen that we should do this or that. She backed off totally this time, the most controversial thing that she suggested was getting rid of his nap time dummy in a couple of months - to which I responded, 'yes if he's ready'. No comments about time out, the fact he's still in a cot, about potty training! It was a good meeting.

Our social worker came yesterday. She is really pleased and very happy. We didn't have much to talk about, for me it's just knowing that someone will appear and check up on us every couple of weeks. We can now get the paperwork sorted and apply to court to adopt - he's been here 10weeks which is the minimum time. She said that social services would like us to wait until after the next review meeting - which I have no problem with. I said we were going to wait until we got all the paperwork we should have from boy-o's social worker - she thought that was really sensible.

This morning we have been to a parent and toddler group for the second time. It was good that I recognised some faces from when we went before (a fortnight ago). And some of the mums actually spoke to me. One grandmother was there and was very interested in the fact that we are adopting boy-o. I spent quite a bit of time talking to her, and as she goes regularly - it's someone that I will be able to talk to ago!

That's what I am finding hard - going to toddler groups and seeing all these mums in their little groups - obviously knowing each other. So that really should be my next challenge - to have a proper conversation with someone that I don't already know at a group! The groups that we go to on Fridays are different - the one at Church is run by my mates and I know a couple of other people there. The alternative one that we go to is one put on by the adoption agency - and all the children are adopted - so the conservations start easier and flow more as you have less to explain!

I'm starting to find a new routine, patterns to life and what we do! It's all starting to feel more normal!

4 comments:

Gil said...

I'm glad you have a Toddler and Mom group to go to. I hear that those sorts of groups are fantastic resources. I've yet to find one myself, but I don't know if I should/could. Being older (almost 41) with an almost 2-year old, and not being from the province (so I don't know the resources), it's harder to fit in or feel comfortable. However, from the younger moms who do go to these sorts of groups, I have heard very good things. I hope yours is just as wonderful!

Emily said...

For this .. I wish you lived in the US. Having lived in England its been my experience that its so much harder to break the ice. Americans speak to everyone (all the time, and loudly) and Ive had no problem getting to know moms in toddler groups. I say do as I did in England and just barge your way in! Boy-o will help ease the transition. Does he play with the other children, or alongside them?

Lost in Space said...

I love that you are finding a new normal. What a long time in the making this has taken and I couldn't be more thrilled that you are all settling in so well.

I hope the group stuff gets easier and you are able to find some good support. It sounds like you are putting yourself out there and really making an effort for this to happen, even though it is sometimes uncomfortable...

Lost in Space said...
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