Tuesday 15 May 2012

Old problem revisited.

So after an ill week last week, with boy-o been with either myself or M all week; today he went back to the childminders.

There were tears this morning before he was dropped off. There were tears when he was picked up - and 2 1/2 hours into tonights sleep, there has been shaking and screaming already. Ever think I shouldn't have gone back to work.

I can explain it, I can understand it, but I can't help him. I wish I could. I'm thinking of ordering a photo-pillow case, so that he has our image with him at all night.

I wish that I could reassure him, that although we have to leave him, we will always come back. He is with us for good... Last night I read our 'Owl Babies' book - with the key message, Mummys always come back. Tonight we had 'We belong together'. And he knows - but I come back again to the 'does he understand what it means?'

Nothing more we can do for the moment, except give him what he needs, reassurance!

3 comments:

Emily said...

That has to be so painful and frustrating for you. I think I understand a bit, having had the toddlers in my home. Ive never been able to offer one a forever home though and can only imagine how helpless you must feel when it seems that time isnt healing the wound. I can only think that he will continue to feel more and more secure. He is grieving, and we know that grief does not resolve over night. it can come back and bite you just when you think you are 100% better.

nh said...

Thank you Emily...the thing is I know it's about grieving, I know that (hopefully) he will get to a point that he can verbalise it, which will make it better. In the meanwhile, sleep is the issue - which you must know a lot about at the minute. xx

Isobel said...

This is an interesting one, and one that is getting worse for Bonzo. He has been with me for nearly 3 years now, and the more he attaches, the more he worries about me leaving him. Not that he expresses that, just acts it out!!