Sorry - this is long and is mostly for my memories....
The last couple of days have been bizarre. I walked into walk yesterday feeling more than a little odd. And I left feeling full of hope for the future. Thursday was saying goodbye to some very special people that I have taught for a long time. People that I watched grow in height and character from being 11 years old and nervous at starting school to truly wonderful (mostly) young adults who are ready to continue their journey on. It happens every few years that you get to teach the same children over and over again.
I taught some of these children on that horrid Friday afternoon when I started to miscarry and yet felt that I had to stay at school. I taught them through the bleakness and despair that followed, and continued to follow. But through the hope as well. They don't know that, of course, but I do. But they do know that we are adopting a little boy - they were the first students at school to know, and they were lovely about it. They are deeply upset for themselves, but so happy for me. They baked a cake, got a card which they all signed, two of them wouldn't leave my classroom yesterday, I had flowers and hugs from them. And even though I don't teach them on a Friday, they all passed through my room at least once.
Friday was strange. It started with my boss having a dig at me over going out for a meal with friends - not the whole department. I have to say the day ended at the pub - with the same friends! Friday is assembly day for my form, so there we went. My other boss (year head); came up and asked me if the pupils knew why I was leaving to which I responded that my form did... a little into the assembly after his usual weekly spiel he said 'it's a sad day today, because we have to say goodbye to Mrs ....' He spoke about the fact I was adopting a little boy, and how pleased he was for me. He then called me forward and I received a bunch of flowers which another head of year gave to me, along with threatening to sing or give me a full on snog! My year head then preceded to give an assembly about heroes and finished with the challenge to the pupils to figure out who the heroes were in the world, celebrities or people who do special things like adopt little boys. I could have cried at that point.
My first lesson was a non-contact and I spent a lot of time moving things from my classroom. I was visited by some of the year 13's, with a bunch of flowers. At break time I was given another bunch of flowers, this time from the science staff, along with a speech about how I will be missed. My year 12's presented me with a card, hugs and chocolates. My year 11's turned up with cake. And at the end of the day, the people I teach chemistry with gave me another bunch of flowers. All sorts of teachers and assistants passed through my classroom, and some came baring gifts and cards. Some just to say 'good luck'.
At the end of the day, I went to the pub for a few quiet drinks with some friends. But lots of people turned up to wish me well. I eventually left after many hugs but no tears; and came home feeling very odd. It's strange to think that I won't be going back to teach at the school for a long time. And that everyone is so happy for me. When I got home, I re-read my cards, and I cried. Because the words that have been written are so lovely and caring and cherishing. These people are the reason that I've stuck it out for so long at that school.
My life is about to change, in a way that I've dreamt of for so long. And it's good to know that so many people have my back.
Are We Really Unhappy?
6 hours ago