I have decided for the moment to leave this space, my reasons are real and varied and I am not about to justify them.
I started this blog 6 years ago, when I was in a dark and sad place. This place still exists but is far smaller than it was. But it was where I was, and where I lived. This blog chronicles a journey from there, to here. But it isn't a place where I can empty my head like I once was able to.
Last year, I went back and removed some posts. They sit in draft form, where I can see them, but no-one else can. The reasons I did this are now multiplied, I interact with people on twitter that I know in real life and that number is growing. This space to empty my head, has many real thoughts, but some of them might hurt others. That was not the purpose of writing them, the purpose was to heal, and recover.
I have a new blog, not a space to empty my head, but a space to write about adoption, both positive and negative. I have a private space to empty my head, to continue in my journey of healing.
I never imagined walking away from this place, but it isn't what it was. My life has changed, but so have my aims in blogging. I need to leave this blog as a place of what was...and I may visit sometimes, but if it can't be what I need it to be, and it can't, I need to leave and start afresh.
And so a quiet ending, no big bangs and flashes. Life continues, in the darkest moments there is always hope, and hope continues.
"My story is important not because it is mine, God knows, but because if I tell it anything like right, the chances are you will recognize that in many ways it is also yours. Maybe nothing is more important than that we keep track, you and I, of these stories of who we are and where we have come from and the people we have met along the way because it is precisely through these stories, in all their particularity, as I have long believed and often said, that God makes himself known to each of us most powerfully and personally."
Welcome to my blog - it's my pathway to sanity!
I have PCOS and Endo. We ttc for 7 years and endured treatments like Clomid, Met and IVF and ICSI. After 7 years of fighting to become pregnant, we decided to follow the adoption path. Having been approved to adopt in Oct 2010, our son boy-o was placed with us in Mar 2011 - follow us on our ongoing journey...